The Seasonal Aisle

8 Jan 2010 by Zach Davis, 3 Comments »

Thanks in advance to Tim Speciale for the picture.  Be sure to check out his website which houses the most interesting psychology facts and Facebook psychology studies that you’ve likely never heard of.

Don’t worry, this isn’t another Midwest weather rant.  Or is it?

It is.  Sorry.  I’ll keep it short and sweet.

I went back to the Midwest (voluntarily) again over New Years Eve. Of the three days I spent in my old home in [small suburb], Illinois, I left the confines of my house one time.  During this time of the year, the only thing more miserable than being locked in one house for that long of a period, is leaving said house.  Subzero wind chills cuts right through your skin and starts to pick away at your soul.  In small doses, it’s manageable.  If exposed for too long however, you run a serious risk of permanent bitterness (aka Zach Davis’ disease).

As critical as these attacks of one region’s climate may seem, they are not off-base.  The only reason anyone spends any time outside of a building during this time of the year, is to get in a transportation unit, to move as quickly as possible to the next building.  The time spent in between buildings will accurately predict how good or bad of a day they’ve had.  Since then, an active avoidance of the outside world becomes a central focus, legitimate options for entertainment are rather scarce.  This is why Alcoholism and the Midwest go together like peanut butter and jelly.  You can only watch ESPN, read a good novel, or play scrabble for so long before you get a bit stir crazy.  Alcohol offers similar psychology benefits to going outdoors, a change of scenery.  One just happens to be more chemical than the other.

However, I clearly offer a jaded view point on this particular topic.  Don’t just take my word for it…

The following picture was taken from a grocery store 10 minutes from where I originated:

Midwest Alcoholism

Christmas lights or Miller Lites?

Be sure to notice the “Seasonal” sign overhead.  I rest my case.


Tags: , , ,

Similar posts

  • Ooohlien

    Where was that picture taken? That’s unbelievable. The gall that place had to place the ‘Seasonal’ sign. And how much do you want to bet that the remote-start feature that can be installed in cars is directly related to the awful weather of the Midwest?

  • zachrd99

    McHenry, Illinois. It’s difficult knowing they have to wait until late summer for the next high school football season.

  • Pingback: The Midwest is Wasted | The Good Badger

A Road Map Toward Perfect Health

A Road Map Toward Perfect Health

Conventional wisdom on diet and exercise has left us fat, depressed, and retarded. We deserve better.

Appalachian Trials- Available in Print!

Appalachian Trials- Available in Print!

Digg Digg HOLY HOT DAMN Five words: Appalachian Trials, Available in PRINT “Sorry, I couldn’t hear you, can you say

3 Learning Lessons from 2011

3 Learning Lessons from 2011

Digg Digg Holy Moldy Mayo, Batman! 2011 has been a monumental year for Mr. Zach Davis; this is a simple

5 Million Steps in 5 Minutes: Badger’s Appalachian Trail Video Slideshow

5 Million Steps in 5 Minutes: Badger’s Appalachian Trail Video Slideshow

Digg Digg In the picture above, you are witness to what happens when a ginger head lays unattended for five

Follow Me!

Follow Me! Follow Me! Follow Me! Follow Me!

Search

E-mail sign up

Recent Posts

Blogroll

Archives

 

May 2013
M T W T F S S
« Feb    
 12345
6789101112
13141516171819
20212223242526
2728293031  

Good Badger E-Mail

Tags

Subscribe to Posts By E-Mail

Enter your email address:

Delivered by FeedBurner

Twitter

Polls

Would You Rather?

View Results

Loading ... Loading ...